Sometimes I really wonder why is it that the two of us just can't get past even a
week without arguing over something. And usually, the trigger is something really minor and dumb. Arghh.
I'm seriously envious of girls who are practically best friends with their mums and can share everything. If only I shared the kind of relationship with mine like I had with daddy. Sighh.
But some things, it's no use hoping for. All I can do is tolerate and make it better in any way possible. Much as I hate to admit it, we're far from best friends, really..if we can stop jumping at each other's throats every few days, I guess I just need to live out the rest of my life like that.
I'm not proud to say that I'm not exactly her dream daughter, or that she isn't quite my dream mum either..yes, cherish your family, I know. I'm trying..trying...trying....
I miss my daddy...On a happier note, my darling baby nephew is finally out in this bright and colourful world. =) Nameless as yet, but little junior is really adorable. Can't wait for his baby shower...great job favourite coussie. I'm soo glad everything went fine and you're now the proud mummy of a beautiful baby boy. *huggs*
Guess the earlier incident kinda shook me up a little..that, and a few more other things. Suddenly, I'm not so sure if life is really as good as I thought it was for me. Sometimes, especially lately, I don't get much time to be jaded and ponder on the cynicism of what goes on around me. In a way it's good, but I feel like I've lost a small part of myself along the way. My life now revolves around a few things only.
I miss hanging out with my friends. Everyone has gotten so busy, and events in one another's life makes each of us lazy to a certain extent. I'm no longer as proactive in calling people out to just hang out and chill..making extra effort to get everyone together to have fun..or even responding positively to those who bother.
It's been a tiring day..or rather, afternoon. Reflective, emotional, tearful, exhausting. And the list continues.
Been so married to work the last couple of weeks and months that I've forgotten what the setting sun looks like as I walk out of the office building. Now, every night, I'm greeted by the moon hanging in the sky whenever I finally call it a day. And in a couple of hours, the new day starts again with the same routine.
No more running, blading, suppers, or even dinners with people (other than colleagues who leave equally late). If not, it's just dinner delivery to the office.
This sucks.
I've lost my momentum..my motivation to stay active and fit..and for this very crap reason, I am entirely not prepared for the marathon I actually forgot I registered for.
And so, I've decided to put my marathon-completion goal on hold. There's no way I'm going to make it through that thing without a single bit of preparation. They should really have a treadmill in office.
Much as I'm disappointed with myself, in a way, the inability to complete (or even
start) what I signed myself up for kinda jolts me awake to the reality that this nonsense I'm doing to myself has gotta stop.
I just used this phrase on my favourite senior: the company won't die without you for a day, but you will suffer if you go to work sick. Whether sick or not..there's really no point in working your ass off and neglecting everything else.
The number of appointments I've had to cancel because of OT..the lack of time to run after work..to hang out with people who actually knock off when the sun is about to set..flying the aeroplane of friends..and the days just pass me by.
I don't wanna end off this year with the realisation that I've accomplished nothing much.
Need to start getting my life back on track. Time for a reality check.
And I don't want the tears no more. 
